[{"quote":"It's not a lie if you believe it.","season":6,"episode":16,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I was in the pool!","season":5,"episode":21,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"Do you ever get down on your knees and thank God you know me and have access to my dementia?","season":4,"episode":2,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm much more comfortable criticizing people behind their backs.","season":7,"episode":1,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"Jerry, just remember, it's not a lie if you believe it.","season":6,"episode":16,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I have a bad feeling that whenever a lesbian looks at me they think, 'That's why I'm not a heterosexual.'","season":5,"episode":20,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"You know I always wanted to pretend I was an architect.","season":5,"episode":14,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm the opposite of every guy you've ever met.","season":5,"episode":22,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm speechless. I have no speech.","season":5,"episode":1,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"My life is the complete opposite of everything I want it to be.","season":5,"episode":22,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I lie every second of the day. My whole life is a sham.","season":2,"episode":11,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm disturbed, I'm depressed, I'm inadequate. I got it all!","season":4,"episode":11,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm a great quitter. It's one of the few things I do well.","season":5,"episode":13,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"When you look annoyed all the time, people think that you're busy.","season":8,"episode":3,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"Every time I think I'm out, they pull me back in!","season":8,"episode":16,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I always get the feeling when lesbians look at me, they're thinking, 'That's why I'm not a heterosexual.'","season":5,"episode":20,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"You know, we're living in a society!","season":2,"episode":11,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I think I can sum up the show for you with one word: nothing.","season":4,"episode":3,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I was handcuffed to the bed... in my underwear.","season":4,"episode":11,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm unemployed and I live with my parents.","season":3,"episode":17,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm like a commercial jingle. First it's a little irritating, then you hear it a few times, you hum it, you're singing it to your parents.","season":7,"episode":7,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"Was that wrong? Should I not have done that?","season":5,"episode":10,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I always picture a relationship as a rope. Two people pulling. If one person lets go, it just falls.","season":4,"episode":4,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I can sense the slightest human suffering.","season":5,"episode":3,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"The sea was angry that day, my friends – like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli.","season":5,"episode":14,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"You're killing independent George!","season":5,"episode":17,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm disturbed, I'm depressed, I'm inadequate, I got it all!","season":4,"episode":11,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I don't trust men in capes.","season":5,"episode":10,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"If she can't find me, she can't break up with me.","season":8,"episode":1,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"Just remember, it's not a lie... if you believe it.","season":6,"episode":16,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm a man of integrity... but I'm also a man who doesn't like to lose money.","season":6,"episode":9,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"You have no idea what an idiot is... Elaine just gave me a chance to get out and I didn't take it. This is an idiot.","season":7,"episode":24,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I love a good nap. Sometimes it's the only thing getting me out of bed in the morning.","season":8,"episode":8,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm not a bad person. I may have done some bad things, but I'm not a bad person.","season":6,"episode":8,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"You know I'm handicapped! I'm emotionally handicapped!","season":8,"episode":10,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"The fabric is killing me. I can't wear this, I'm getting upset!","season":6,"episode":11,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm shifting into soup mode.","season":7,"episode":6,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"What is that smell? It's like the funk of 40,000 years!","season":9,"episode":3,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"I knew I had hit my high note, so I thanked the crowd and I was gone.","season":9,"episode":16,"character":"George Costanza"},{"quote":"Serenity now!","season":9,"episode":3,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"You sayin' you want a piece of me?!","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"I got a lot of problems with you people, and now you're gonna hear about it!","season":9,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son...","season":9,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"Festivus is back, baby!","season":9,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"I find tinsel distracting.","season":9,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"You couldn't smooth a silk sheet if you had a hot date with a babe... I lost my train of thought.","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm like a phoenix, rising from Arizona!","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"What the hell does that mean?!","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"I told you I was hungry, damn it!","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"You want a Christmas card? You want a Christmas card? Alright! Here's your Christmas card!","season":5,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"You don't need glasses, you're just weak!","season":6,"episode":4,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"This is Frank Costanza. What the hell did you trade Jay Buhner for?!","season":8,"episode":20,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"You're looking at the man who invented the beltless trench coat!","season":6,"episode":4,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"That's my move! I used it in the Korean War!","season":5,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"Welcome to the dollhouse, baby!","season":9,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"Let me tell you, I got a good mind to take this TV and throw it out the window!","season":5,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"You couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel!","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"I'm busting, Jerry! I'm busting!","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"You're not making any sense, you know that?!","season":7,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"I got a good deal on some Cubans. You want one?","season":8,"episode":20,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"My George isn't clever enough to hatch a scheme like this.","season":5,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"George, you're not going to amount to anything!","season":6,"episode":4,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"You sayin' I'm not sponge-worthy?","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"You couldn't sell a ketchup popsicle to a woman in white gloves!","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"I will not tolerate infestation!","season":6,"episode":4,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"Let me just say this: I am not a man who likes to be intimidated.","season":5,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"Stop crying and fight your father!","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"I served in Korea, I can handle this!","season":5,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"You want a piece of me?!","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"George, I want you to come over and help me fix the screen door!","season":7,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"Do you know about the cup holders on the inside of the screen door?","season":6,"episode":4,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"This is our son! He's trying to sell computers!","season":9,"episode":3,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"George, I've been reading about this internet. Why don't you get involved in that?","season":9,"episode":3,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"I told them I was already in a fight this year.","season":8,"episode":18,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"I don't need this. I got a good mind to go back to selling aluminum siding!","season":6,"episode":4,"character":"Frank Costanza"},{"quote":"You want me to sit there and listen to all your dribble?!","season":9,"episode":10,"character":"Frank Costanza"}]